When I was a young man, when I was a kid, as I grew up. bladdey, bladdey, blah... I was fatalistic. I often thought of the Cold War, of the pending nuclear apocalypse. I grew to know that I was near the Holston Defense Plant, in Kingsport, TN. I familarized myself with terms such as "blast radius" and "fallout zone"
I still remember the signs adjacent to my elementary school doors, of the promise of safety...
A fallout shelter, the sign professed.
It was a lie.
I grew to know the lie. I worked at that school during the summers, I scraped gum & boogers off chairs, I painted buckets of graffiti. I saw the "safety" offered. The safety consisted of some stale crackers, perhaps some tins of water. (I never tested it... blick)
I considered stocking an old coal mine (there were plenty, my Grandfather had numerous ones on his land; I knew of others) with Beanie-Weenies, beef jerky and Ritz crackers.
Not much of a life to continue, in retrospect. I thought of whether it was best to spend eternity eating Beanie-Weenies and stale crackers, or to be instantly vaporized in a flash.
That was my paradigm for survival.
Much like post 9/11... we seek the illusion of safety.
My thoughts even encompassed my life. I joined the United States Air Force straight out of high school in 1984...
When I was in the U.S. Air Force, we practiced being at war. We thought of others trying to vaporize us, to kill us. Do you understand what that does to one's psyche... to constantly be looking over ones shoulder, to wonder if it is safe to let ones guard down?
The USAF, allies and the USN (Navy) held an annual exercise called GLOBAL SHIELD. I played along with the home version. I held a Top Secret security clearance, I saw the message traffic because I worked in the communications center. I saw the unraveling of the world as we know it... message traffic was simulated... but the world was falling apart.
Fortunately, I was considered "mission essential." Even when we were pretending to blow one another other up, I had to be on standby for the real thing.
The process is called MITO (Minimum Interval Take-Off) It is an effort throw the maximum amount of aircraft & bombs safely into the sky, in the least amount of time.
Consequently, I got to see what the end of the world looks like. This is REALLY what the end of the world looks like... these are nuclear armed planes, ready to bomb our adversaries into the stone age.
That is not Delta or United Airlines stacked on the deck... that is the other half of your oblivion awaiting you.
I saw the planes take to the sky, I saw the vapor trails into the sunrise... I felt the thunder, I feared for my child asleep... I wanted so badly to hold her and tell her the lie... that it would be OK.... but I could not.
You want to live the lie? Been there, done it. Go for it.
It is all a lie... yet it is true.
The End of the World, Part II
The End of the World, Part III
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